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May their souls rest in peace now

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

I found out a couple of days ago that my very close friend’s mum passed away.  She had been very sick and hospitalised for quite awhile now.  These are the times that I really feel sad being so far away from family and friends – the true times of need.  All I would have wanted to do is to give my friend a hug and a shoulder to cry on.  But I couldn’t.  So I did the next best – message her and call her.  The decision to leave family and friends to travel 1000s of miles away to build a life is one that is probably one of the most difficult decisions in life.  But I remind myself of the big picture – the reason we chose to do this.  And I leave the rest in God’s hands. 

To my friend who is going through this loss : be strong, know that God is always by your side and that you are always in my heart and prayers. 

I also wanted to speak of another person who passed away last week – I can’t really say she lost the battle with cancer, because from what I read, I think she was a winner, never giving up.  She maintained a blog and wrote this list of NOT New Year Resolutions but a list of why she wasn’t ready to go this year yet.  It breaks my heart that she may not have completed some of these things.  I pray for God to give her family strength at this time.  Please do read the list she wrote.  Such simple beautiful things we take for granted.  So maybe, let’s do something to honour her.  Choose one thing/event that is special in your life this year – celebrate it and cherish it. 

I’m reading a beautiful book called “Tuesdays with Morrie” by Mitch Albom right now.  I’m almost done.  It’s such a simple guide to how one should live their life.  He says that we are always busy preparing ourselves for various journies, trips, holidays – but are we ever preparing ourselves for the Journey to death – something that is inevitable.  It’s not as morbid as it sounds.  It’s as simple as – have you said all the things you want to say to the people you love?  Have you done things that you wish to do?  Have you loved like there is no tomorrow – even if it were just loving your pet?

I know that I have regrets that I never told me father enough that I loved him when he was alive.  We were brought up in a culture in which “I love yous” are not often spoken – but are shown in actions.  But later on, we are left wondering if the other person understood those actions and knew what you were saying. 

“If only.  Those must be the two saddest words in the world.”  ~~~ Mercedes Lackey

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9 Comments leave one →
  1. Thursday, June 12, 2008 5:48 am

    I’m sorry to read about your good friend’s mum. It is true what you say – we should not take anything for granted and celebrate life every day….

  2. Thursday, June 12, 2008 8:36 am

    So sad… I am sorry to hear about your friend’s mom, and for the blogger who died. 😦

    Think I’ll go give the kids a hug…

  3. Thursday, June 12, 2008 8:44 am

    Bavani-

    beautifully expressed..agree with you on all the aspects, esp. the part where you mention how we make a choice of travelling so far awar from India to make a life for ourselves here.

    Very sorry to hear about your friend’s mother.

  4. Thursday, June 12, 2008 10:16 am

    I’m very sorry for your friend. It’s very hard to be away from loved ones. I’ve experiences that also and it’s very lonely at times. Thank goodness for the Internet and phones.

    Thanks for giving us a reminder to express who we feel. To often we don’t tell people they are important to us and we love them because we think they know.

  5. boiseangel permalink*
    Thursday, June 12, 2008 1:58 pm

    @spillay, Julie and Joy : That’s what it’s all about isn’t it? Celebrating each living day and celebrating the ones you love.

    @Mitr : Yes, it hard choosing to move away so far to make a new life. It’s even harder, now that I have a little one – knowing that she’ll never know the pleasure of a big family. By the way, I’m from Singapore, just in case you didn’t know. But I’m sure it would be the same for you.

  6. Thursday, June 19, 2008 12:53 pm

    Bavani, I hope everything is OK with you and your family…. Just taking a blogging break???

  7. Saturday, June 21, 2008 8:27 am

    This was a lovely tribute to your friends and their loved ones that have passed away.

    I loved that book!

    Have a good weekend, Bavani – nice to see you – see you soon – Kellan

  8. Laksh permalink
    Tuesday, June 24, 2008 12:08 pm

    Bavani, been a while since we heard from you. Hope all is well out there.

  9. boiseangel permalink*
    Tuesday, June 24, 2008 12:48 pm

    @Julie & Laksh : Hope my latest blog answers your questions 🙂 – thank you 🙂

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